Now Playing: Adele - Right as Rain
So I had my date with Slip tonight. We went to Fuzzy Peach and then walked around downtown. It would have been really nice...if I was even the slightest bit attracted to him.
I am a horrible person. Its absolutely not that he's ugly or anything, I'm just not personally attracted to him, you know? But now I feel like I've been leading him on this whole time, and I just feel so bad about it! He's so sweet, I don't want to hurt his feelings. But he was talking about coming to see me again, and I just...don't want him to waste his time I guess.
But what makes me a horrible person is that I'm just sort of relieved. So I'm really more disappointed in myself for being SUCH A HORRIBLE PERSON than being disappointed that I didn't have as nice of a time as he seemed to. But you guys get it, right? I don't have to worry about working out a long distance anything. And we haven't been getting to know each other for very long. Its not like I got him to fall in love with me first or anything.
Okay, so moment of truth. He just text me and...well long story short this is it. This is the time when I have to tell him that I just don't feel the same way like I thought I could. He could understand that, right? But he's driving. Oh God, what if he reads what I say and wrecks and dies?! I can't tell him now. I could kill him, literally.
So maybe that's partly a joke, but still. I don't want to have to tell him. Anyway, I'm doing it anyway. Ripping off the bandaid.
Is it bad that I'm mostly relieved because I couldn't be Via with him? I mean, he met me when I was Olivia.
Horrible. I'm so horrible.
