I've put this off for a long, long time. Honestly, I should have written the end of the blog a month and a half ago and I'm not sure why I didn't. Maybe it's because I didn't want to say bye. Maybe I'm just that lazy. Either way I'm going back to school on Saturday for my sophomore year so I figure my freshman year blog should probably end pretty soon.
Don't get me wrong though, I've been thinking about what I'm going to say all summer.
There were a few important lessons I learned this year.
1. STUDY. I think this is the most important. I learned this the hard way a.k.a. a few bad test grades. But when I actually studied, I did well. High school was such a breeze, but don't think that college is the same like I did. You will be sorely disappointed in yourself like I was.
2. Know your boundaries. This applies to everything. Know how late you can stay up and still make it to class the next day. Know how much TV you can watch and still get your work done. Know how often you can go out and manage class and homework. Know how much you can consume and still be in control. Know how far you're willing to go with someone else. Don't ever do anything you're not comfortable with. You'll hate yourself for it later. I didn't necessarily learn all these the hard way, and I'm actually really proud of myself for understanding a lot of these boundaries already. But some people do learn the hard way. Just know that you don't have to.
3. Learn to manage your time. My best advice on this is to KEEP A PLANNER. I had so many things going on this year that it really made me appreciate keeping up with my planner. I had a daily to-do list hanging up by my door that really helped me as well. Anything that helps you keep your mind on track and in tact.
4. Join clubs that interest you and put yourself out there. I met so many great people through the different organizations and clubs I joined. And between all the class time and homework and tests to study for and papers to write, finding time to do something you enjoy with other people who enjoy it helped me to keep myself focused and, well, sane.
5. Never compromise yourself, but don't be afraid to let yourself grow up and change. When I was in high school, I would hear all kinds of stories of people going to college and becoming different people and no one liked them anymore. I swore to myself that I would never do that. But after freshman year was over, my friend from home told me I had changed and said it was bad and I saw it from another perspective. All I've done is I've given myself a chance to make mistakes. When I was growing up and all through high school, I never did anything bad. I never stepped out of line or colored in the wrong places or anything because I was always terrified of disappointing someone. In some ways, I still am. But you guys know the butterfly analogy by now. I've really changed into someone who is comfortable with herself, and the fact that I've done things in the past year that I never would have before doesn't make me a bad person. So while you shouldn't change so drastically that you go from being a kind person to being a complete douche all the time or a hermit to a heroin addict, you shouldn't be afraid to grow up. I feel so much better about myself now than I did a year ago.
I haven't decided if I'm going to write another blog for next year. On the one hand its actually gotten me into a few awkward, embarassing and down right bad situations. Sometimes people ask me things about something I said and I really didn't want them to know anymore than what I wrote. Awkward. There was something with one of the guys that I had a crush on where another guy told a whole bunch of guys what he read and that he knew who it was and the guy that it was was sitting right there. Embarassing. There was a mishap with something involving my job. Down. Right. Bad.
But this blog has done a lot for me, too. A friend that reads this blog who is from another state told her friend about the blog and now someone I don't even know that lives hundreds of miles away reading about my life thinking its interesting. What a freaking confidence boost. I've had so many people ask me when my next post will be and tell me they keep up with my blog. I guess the blog just made me feel important in that way. It was also like an outlet too. There were very few people I met this year that I really talked to openly and about anything, and not really anyone I just call when I want to talk. So being able to let out my feelings in this way was really therapeutic. And I'd like to think that someone somewhere read something in this blog and learned from a mistake I made or a lesson I learned myself. Seriously, if that's happened to any of you, please tell me. That will make me the happiest person alive.
I guess I can make up my mind about that later. But for now its time to say adieu. I hope something I've written at some point has helped you in some way. God bless.
xoxo
